Yankees Dump Piazza Offer

The Yankees have decided to pass on former Mets catcher Mike Piazza.
In a statement issued to Piazza’s agent Dan Lozano by Brian Cashman, the conversation went something like this:

Hello Lozano – Cashman here, look, were going to have to pass on your guy for three reasons:

One – He’s too **** old.
Two – We already have two catchers.
Three – The only spot open for a guy with no arm and no knees would be beer coaster and we don’t let the guys drink in the clubhouse.

Looks like Piazza is more than likely headed to the West Coast and the San Diego Padres for $2 million.

Hey Lozano, give Theo Epstein a call, last I heard they have a spot open in centerfield.

Ok Bernie Williams and Andy Phillips, you guys can breathe easy now.

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